About Me

  A daughter of Indian immigrants who was a high school runaway for months at a time, tried to commit suicide, failed, and then turned around and collected a lot of graduate degrees and ended up with a robust life in Manhattan, I have a story to tell. I decided to tell it for the other people out there who need to know they are not alone in their experiences.  

I am sharing my story for a lot of people. The children of Asian immigrants who battle their parents through an endless maze of rules and expectations.  Those who have lived through the nightmare of an abusive parent, living each day in fear.  Teenagers who have run away from home because the streets  feel safer than home. Kids who are convinced they will never achieve a future. People who wish they were dead and also the people who have lost someone to suicide- so they can understand what the suicidal person went through.  More than anything, I am sharing my story for the others out there who are genetically predisposed to have depression and know they will never be rid of its curse.

For me, it never helped to hear typical platitudes created by the American mental health system. "You will get better." "You will heal." It has also never helped that "depression" is a term thrown around by everyone. "I am depressed because of politics." "I am depressed because my football team lost." Depression- true depression- cuts far deeper.  All the therapy and medication in the world cannot write over what has been written by your genetics, though it can certainly help ease the pain.

The only thing that has ever helped me is to hear an honest account from other people who were born hard-wired for depression. While it can't fix depression, for a few minutes, I can embrace someone else's pain and know it matches my own.  It helps to know that we are  existing together  in a life we would rather not be living.  

One day my story will become a book, but for now, this website offers snapshots of my life, in case it can help you feel less alone.